Thursday, February 24, 2011

Ain't That Too Bad?

I'm having one of those moments where I know I have zero clue.

I was just looking out the window into the back yard at what appears to be a path through the snow-filled woods behind our house.  I know that there isn't really a path there, the way just looks like it's clear.  If I were to go out and try to walk on that "path" there would in fact be all kinds of rocks and fallen branches, probably some brambles and definitely soft patches in the snow that would trip me and send me face first into a nearby tree or something. Trip!  Wham! Blink, blink blink... snow all over my face, sticks in my hair.

That is exactly how I feel about life right now.  I feel like I'm walking around with a bag over my head and I can't see where I'm going or if/when I'm going to bump into something.

Only I can see.  I can see beautiful things and sad things and neutral things.  I just can't see the route to take that would be the most beneficial.

I want some answers!  I want explanations!  I want to know!  Ain't that too bad?

I know you're supposed to "enjoy the ride" but I find that hard to do when there are so many sudden smacks in the face along the way.  It's enough to make a girl want to just get right back in bed.

It's not even like I have a well thought out plan that I'm putting in motion.  I'm just going to the studio every day to work.  I don't have massive goals to thwart.  Why do I feel like I'm about to fall down a hole?

5 comments:

Hope said...

It sounds like you need to train Fay to act as your seeing eye dog!

Melissa said...

Yeah, I'll carry her around (as she's partially paralyzed) and she can bark me where to go.

Melissa said...

Except that she just wants to go to the food bag.

Aqua Nettie said...

Oh crap. You mean you are a sentient being? You have feelings? Doubts? Confusion? You need guidance? Shit. You ARE in trouble. It's hard to be deep in a world where the most important thing people seem to talk about is arranging books by color. God help us all. Where's my feaking hairspray? That's what I want to know.

Sally G. Knight said...

I know exactly how you feel.