Tremors

Well, it's the holidays and I'm already feeling overwhelmed by all of the stuff I have to do. How about you? I'm not even thinking about the gift shopping either (Gift shopping doesn't actually worry me - I'm a fantastic shopper)

There are also big changes pending in my life right now - things that might happen in the next year or so or not for a long time if at all. (That statement is so vague! That's how things always are and we just try not to think about it) Despite my discomfort with the way things have been going lately these changes have me worried that I might lose some things about my life that I love (And how obvious is that? That is the nature of change. We're always afraid that the things that come into our lives after a change aren't going to be as good as the things we don't have anymore)

In short, SHAKY GROUND!!!!! AAAAAAAA!!!

I feel like I'm less resilient than I used to be. Just when I'm feeling pretty good some dumb thing happens and I'm smacked back into the dumps. I feel like I used to be able to shrug off setbacks more easily, that I didn't take things as hard as I do now.

I vaguely remember hearing (reading?) a story about a study someone did on rats. The theory being tested was that rats that survive through really difficult circumstances are the toughest rats. The study found that the surviver rats had been the toughest rats before their ordeals. After their ordeals they were just stressed-out, depleted rats.

Perhaps I feel like a depleted rat?

Well, nothing I can do about that now. I just have to wait and see what develops and get cracking on the tasks I've set for myself. At least I can wear a cotton-candy-scented wig while I'm at it.