Spring Night

Hey me, remember this: the first night in spring in Vermont when the frogs woke up that day and the Peepers are peeping and you're hanging out of the bathroom window looking at the fuzzy full moon behind some light clouds and feeling the warm spring breeze blow.

California Brunch

Brunch dessert

They have fancy sand here

Bet I'll Be Late

Man, does this blog need a facelift! Not today though.

It's too cold to do anything. It's too early to eat breakfast. I'm a big crank and I don't want to do anything involved with getting ready to go to work.

You know what I want to do today? I want to have some damned fun! Make chocolate cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and decorate them with multicolor confetti sprinkles - the kind you eat, duh, not paper ones - and maybe some clear sparkly sugar to evoke actual frost. Wintery! Festive!

Then I want to go get some fancy papers (shiny, glittery stuff, nice tissue paper) and box up the Christmas gifts I got for people and mail them off so they get there in time for Christmas. Wouldn't it be good if I had done that last week? Well I was busy last week so I didn't. I'm busy today too so I won't be doing it today either. Sigh.

You know what else would be nice? Another week to spend just paying attention to Christmas preparations. I'm ready to do that now. All my other stuff I had to do is done. I can shop now. I can make little gifties and send Christmas cards. Well, I'm almost ready. I'll be really ready next week. Oops.

Oh, and I'll need another two weeks to go to parties so I can make sure and see everyone I want to see for the holidays. And let's not forget the holiday baking and cooking that it's so fun to do. I could probably wedge that into the two weeks I set aside for parties, during the days.

So I think I could be ready for Christmas if I spent the next three weeks exclusively on Christmas stuff. Of course we all know that Christmas is in one week and we all have TONS of other stuff we have to do.

Oh well. Gotta muddle through. It won't be perfect. I'll hit the high spots. Some people - a lot of people - will get their gifts in January. I ain't going to see everyone. Life's a process. Live and learn do everything the same wrong way over and over again. I'll probably be late to work today too. I bet I'm not the only one!

The tree looks a lot like it did last year but, hey, I have a tree!

I'm not really that cranky. I've had some fun in the last couple of weeks. I've been lucky to do some things I don't normally do. I hope I find time to post some photos in upcoming days.

Good winter holidays to you all!

October Weekend In Vermont

Morning view from the patio

I had big plans this weekend. I always seem to have big plans. This time it went pretty well. As you may be aware, I can't shut up about my garlic. Garlic is so easy to grow that I kind of became hell-bent on getting some in this year. Below is yet another shot of the extremely neglected vegetable garden where I intended to plant the stuff.

Vegetable Garden, Before

I got a nice, early start by previewing the site and getting intimidated. Since it was a beautiful morning I thought I'd warm up by taking a look around. Some bright blue caught my eye and I was delighted to see that the equally neglected (possibly even more neglected) aconitum was still alive.

Heroic Aconitum (blue)

We still have honeysuckle. This variety smells like a trip to paradise. I have no idea what it is because I didn't plant it.

The hydrangea petiolaris looks very stately this year. I didn't get a good photo of its overall shape. Instead I tried to give you an idea of what it feels like to be standing inside it. A beautiful, golden, peaceful spot.

Hydrangea Petiolaris

We still have quite a number of raspberries. Still no frost by October 21! Unusual. I'm so glad for the fruit.

I spent the rest of the day working in my studio on a project which I will no doubt share with you later (unless I get hit by a bus or something) 

After a number of hours in the studio I was relaxed enough to attempt the vegetable garden.

Part I

In about an hour I managed to make a pretty good first pass. It went far better than I'd imagined it would. The chipmunks made it easier by tunneling under all the weeds and keeping their roots loose. Thanks, little dudes! I rewarded them by eradicating their cover. Maybe they'll forgive me when I get the mulch down, hopefully next week. 

After a surprisingly perfect day of accomplishing my goals, Pete and I had cocktails (well, Pete had beers) on the patio. The vegetables, except for the celery, are from Marc's garden. Pretty sweet.

The next day was, of course, Sunday. You don't get to stay in Vermont all of Sunday so you have to get a move on! I put a little bit more time in in my studio then headed back to the garden. The results:

About 100 peacefully tucked-in garlic cloves settling in for the winter. My ambition was to get them mulched on Sunday too but... No. Hey, you can't have everything. Most of the time. Sometimes you can. I think.

Garlic Festival Liveblog II

It's still live blogging if I haven't had the pickleback yet, right?

Here's Michaela getting her things together after a garlic purchase.

A photo of a stand where we both acquired garlic for planting.

Believe it or not this is the least terrifying photo of us being festive. We were a little disappointed that there were only three vendors selling garlic to plant.

A nice, autumnal shot of my spoils once I got them home: about two-dozen heads of garlic for me to plant, six or so heads for Marc (he doesn't know it yet) a bag of Chai Wallah chai spice, a bag of cider donuts and a ridiculous gallon jug of apple cider. I shouldn't have bought that much cider.

Yeah, and where am I going to plant about 200 cloves of garlic? Oh, that's a riot. Maybe I'll show you tomorrow.

I was delighted to find this rose waiting for me when I got back today. I'm glad to see that not all the rose bushes hate my guts. 

And lookee there - we still have some raspberries!

Picklebacks in Led Zeppelin shot glasses ready to roll!

Garlic Festival Liveblog I

I was an hour early to meet Michaela so I stopped at The Wagon Wheel for coffee etc.

You can see by the photo that not only am I scratching the bacon itch from Tuesday, I'm also wearing red lipstick.

The glazed donut is frikkin' amazing.

A Favorite Memory

This may sound kind of crazy but I used to be a scuba diver. I forget if I've mentioned that before in this blog. It was so long ago.

One of my favorite-memories-for-life is of sitting on the bounding bow of a boat in the water over Roca Redonda in the Galapagos Islands, listening to "Train in Vain" by the Clash on my Walkman, eating M&Ms and watching porpoises leap out of the water. It seems incredible that anyone could have that for a memory but I do.

"Train in Vain" came on my iPod today while I was waiting for the T in Davis Square station and I was brought back to that moment in 1987. The amazing things I've had the good fortune to do.

Back then I was also feeling pretty satisfied with myself because I had chosen not to do the dive at Roca Redondo that day. Chris McFarling, our naturalist guide, had made a big hullabaloo about how challenging the dive would be. He predicted masses of huge hammerheads, overpowering currents and I don't remember what-all else. Wonder whatever happened to that guy?

Anyway, I wasn't intimidated by what he said, I just wanted a day off. Isn't that funny? 

We'd encountered hammerheads before and they were, well, comical. There were two of them. They spotted me and my brother and were so startled that they bumped into each other head-on then took off in opposite directions. Maybe that was a lucky one-off but that was my experience of them. They didn't faze me. Nor the bull sea lions or the overpowering currents. What the hell does faze a twenty-something? Dreams about being naked in class on surprise final exam day for a class you forgot you'd enrolled in is about it. 

I just decided I wanted a day off and I was damn proud of myself for taking it and not caving to pressure of any kind. I was having such a great time up there, on top of the boat and not under water, listening to my music, devouring my chocolate. 

I imagine I probably rewound "Train in Vain" at least a few times so I could enjoy it over and over. That thought reminded me of the old technology and how you had to rewind. You had to wait for the tape to spool back so you could play it again. Not anymore. 

I tell ya, back in my day...

Well the old lady's mind is going for sure. I bet I've told this whole memory here before. Maybe not the part about rewinding. 

But golly gee, you can still take a dive trip on the same boat, the Encantada, today! Amazing!

The folks who went on that dive reported a great dive when they got back but no one was eaten or lost at sea. I sound disappointed about that, don't I? I just feel that in retrospect, the dive didn't live up to Chris' hype. No doubt for the best.

Of course in the Galapagos there are no "safe" dives and no boring dives.

What a privilege. 

More Please

It may be that this year has given me a little taste for upheaval. It was a difficult year but I secretly found it exciting. I have learned SO MUCH this year and it has been fascinating.

I had things I love taken from me but I was also given amazing gifts which I could never have predicted.

I learned that when your heart is broken sometimes the only cure is more heartbreak.

I also learned that the saying "a broken heart lets more light in" is true. I was never more receptive to good things and gifts than when my heart was an oozing pile of crushed and broken flesh. In those times I was desperate for good things. I sought them everywhere and they were readily available to me.

Heartbreak itself has been a gift to me this year.

I might be waking up thanks to this year. I hope so.

I might find life more rewarding when it's unpredictable, when the unexpected happens. Earlier this year things I hadn't looked for happened to me. Now that's slowed and I could go back to the way I was before. I had been playing everything safe and comfortable, doing what others expected of me, letting what I wanted take the back seat. I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO THE WAY I WAS BEFORE!

Life is more fun when I actively engage it. When I take risks - or at least stop playing it safe.

I know it's crucial to make mistakes and you really do learn the most from screwing up. I don't know if something counts as a mistake if you know something's the wrong thing to do and you do it anyway. I guess the mistake there is choosing to do the wrong thing. But when you're not sure...

When I'm not sure I tend to play it safe. I don't want to play it safe anymore. Playing it safe leads to comfort and it cuts off opportunities. I learned this year that it's better to be uncomfortable. So now when I notice I'm not sure I'm going to choose risk.

I like mess. I like dealing with challenges. I like learning. I like feeling brave. That stuff doesn't happen as much when you play it safe.

I want to leave more room for uncertainty in my life. I want there to be holes to let the light and wind in. I want my papers to blow around.

I am asking for more chaos.

November First Friday Show

Well that was really fun. We had a number of surprise visitors and there was a lot of traffic. The gallery was very crowded at some points. Pete sold a photo and there were some nibbles at this guy:

He's the Don't Bother To Dream Monster, the first show-ready monster from my new monster drawing series. He's about four feet tall. The paper he's drawn on is about six feet by four feet. I think he got a lot of people to think about my work who normally wouldn't have. People often dismiss things they don't immediately perceive as serious. Putting this guy next to the giant strawberry painting seemed to make them think twice. I got a lot of thoughtful questions and comments on my work. Very encouraging. 

The whole night made me excited about the work that I know is coming. I make the work that I'm called to make regardless of whether I think others can connect with it or not. Still, nothing like getting a positive response to what you're doing.

Birthday 2011

2010 was a difficult year.  For the first half I was pretty proud of myself for being able to compartmentalize the bad and the good and still find ways to enjoy myself.  Actually, I've been patting myself on the back about that ability for the last three years.  Unfortunately that particular emotional resource ran out a little after my dad died.  Since then I've had a hard time enjoying anything.  That's normal - it happens.  As long as I take care of myself I'll get that ability back.  I'm not worried, just waiting.

I did enjoy my birthday though, in a low-key way.  To celebrate we went to Hotel Del Coronado for New Years Day brunch in the Crown Room.  Here's what I wore:

Mom gave me the bag and the shoes for Christmas.  You'd have to feel at least a little bit uplifted by that combo, huh?  You might recognize the shoes from this post.

Here I am towards the end of the meal.  Notice that I have a tiramisu, three chocolate drinks, three little piles of chocolate mousse and a meringue.  The food at the brunch is stellar but my absolute favorite thing is that chocolate drink.  Maybe next time I'll get five!

After brunch we all walked on the beach.  Usually there's a chilly wind blowing on that beach but this day it was just warm and pleasant.  They have disco sand there: it glitters with golden mica.  So fancy!

Then Pete and I took Fay in her doggie stroller to smell the smellicans (pelican roosts really stink) at the La Jolla Cove.

Fay loves to sniff all the smells.  I kept waiting for someone to look into our stroller and say "What a hideous child!" Everybody just thought she was so cute. Well, she is.

When we got back to Mom's house the sun was setting.  It was an incredible sunset.  Pete and I stayed out on the lawn for about an hour watching it.

It was even beautiful to the east.  I had trouble deciding where to look.

I chose to see a phoenix in these clouds because I could use a rebirth.

After the sunset we all had dinner together.  Mom delegated the ordering of the cakes to my brother this year.  For some reason he ordered three birthday cakes for me. There have to be photos of them somewhere but I don't have them.  There was coconut, chocolate with white icing and a fruit tiramisu.  Against the odds, the fruit tiramisu was my hands down favorite.  I wish I had some right now.

So all in all a very pleasant birthday.  Ideal.  Comfortable, delicious and spent with my favorite people.  Way to start the new year.

My Summer Vacation - Media Heavy

Big tomato from our garden.

Someone left a tiki bar on the side of the road. 

Some Things I Miss From Our Vacation

Here's what's sad: I actually miss the stench of Treasure Island.

You know what else I miss? Happy hour at Isla, Treasure Island's tequila bar.

I also miss Sushi Samba at the Palazzo. YUM!

I miss my brother and Sarah (here we are at the truly lurid Peppermill Fireside Lounge)

Here's another photo that Pete took in the Fireside Lounge

I love that place. I first went there with some friends when we were driving cross-country in 1987. It was just as fabulous disco-loungey. Pete and I took his parents there in 2001. We all sat around the fire pit and got into a conversation with a gaggle of drunken UNLV architecture students. One great thing about the Peppermill is that its owners know exactly what they have on their hands. Any renovations they've made have maintained the spirit of the place.

Here I am dumpster diving:

And look who I bumped into at Caesar's Palace:

Here's My Breakfast

I'm in Vegas.

Pete and I are staying at Treasure Island. It smells funny. I think it's some branding gimmick where they have a signature scent that permeates the place. It's not bad exactly, just kind of cheap-o. The waffles and the bun are fantastic though (there's a Vietnamese section in the coffee shop - who knew?).

The awful top forty music is inescapeable. Good thing I brought my ear plugs. I will wear them by the pool later.

Last night the place was swarming with partially sequined and spandexed women. Everyone is wearing the same five-inch black stiletto platform shoes - tedious. It's kind of funny to see what people do. "I'm going to Vegas! Time to get out the whorewear!" There's less of it this morning but it's still there.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not complaining in any way. I love it. It's all so interesting and everyone seems to be having a really fun time. That's what we're here for. So whatever makes it work for you.

And now, off to the pool!

My Aunt's Apartment

I am eating an honest-to-god New York bagel right now. There's nothing like it.

I could live in New York if I could live in my aunt's apartment. She's got a great view and even a little terrace. I could just sit and look out the window all day.

The only catch about my aunt's apartment is that, boy, is she a tidy person. Everything in here looks brand new. It looks as if someone cleans the inside of her refrigerator every day. It is sparkly. I was afraid to drop a sesame seed into the toaster oven. It's really nice and beautiful to stay here but my mom and I are terrified to make a mess!

We're getting over it though. I wonder how she does it and would it be possible to do at my house? Somehow I think I'm not willing to invest the time it would take because I probably wouldn't be able to do anything else besides clean.

My Brain Today: Haphazard

Am I supposed to be impressed by this guy?  What the hell is that expression on his face?  Fake what?  Fake with energy.  Lots of energy there.  "This really sucks!  Yeah!  Awesome.  Heh heh heh."

Ryan Seacrest.  I've heard of him but I don't know what he does.  I could wikipedia him but I don't really care.  Some T.V. thing.

He turned up on the Washington Post homepage a second ago when I started up safari to check the weather.  I will give him that his expression is arresting.  I blogged about it after all.

Moving on, Fay has a stomach ulcer.  Her general condition has also declined a bit and she's had a UTI for two months that her antibiotics haven't seemed to help.  We've changed the antibiotics and we're hoping that that and treating her ulcer will make her feel better.  If she feels better she might move better.  We're hoping because we can't up her prednisone dose due to the ulcer.  So she's on six different pills now but I don't think I'll be giving her any shots this month.  Maybe?

Here is the new website I'm not allowed to go to anymore because I can't go there without buying something:  Momiji!  So cute!  Cheaper than shoes too.  Here's a prettier picture (than R.S., above) from the Momiji site:

Someone there gets paid to make these adorable Flash animations.  I'm jealous!

In other news I read Bono's Op Ed piece in the New York Times today.  He was reminiscing about Frank Sinatra.  He quoted Sinatra as saying, "Being modern’s not about the future, it’s about the present.”  I thought that was really interesting and true.  As I've said before, my present is usually really great but for some reason I often try to avoid it.  I seem to prefer some crazyland that my head's dreamed up.  Like one of those Momiji flash animations.

According to Bono, Sinatra had the guts to live in the present and constantly confront reality.  I guess he might have done that as much as any famous person can.  I can admire that.  I wish I was better at it myself.  However I'm glad I'm not as hard as Sinatra appeared to be.  

I also read the article on Calvinist hipster preacher (huh?) Mark Driscoll, entitled "Who Would Jesus Smack Down?"  Calvinism.  Lots to think about there.  If you want to bother.  Maybe you'd rather wikipedia Ryan Seacrest?  Maybe you already know who he is and don't need to.  Anyway, The Driscoll article was pretty interesting.  People are...weird.  "God says I'm better than you and nothing that you or I can do will change that.  You're going to Hell and I'm going to Heaven.  No matter what!  HA HA HA HA!  SUCKER!!!!!"  It made me think about some of the jerks from high school who I know to still be jerky.  Come to think of it maybe you don't want to read that article.  Why think about jerks if you don't have to?  

My present contains no jerks.  I'm going to be like Frank and enjoy my present.  At least for the next few minutes while I can keep myself from drifting off into some candy-crammed fantasy land.

Boring Aprés Holiday Post

Fay, Pete and I are in California where, as usual, we find it warm and beautiful out and the locals are freezing.  Not literally obviously.

The holiday eating began the moment we arrived at my parents' house, around midnight Thursday night.  We've only just got our acts together enough to open the Christmas presents this morning.

Today we also went to the dog beach with Christian and Sarah and their dogs, Atlas and Johnny.

Now I'm going to go see what else I can eat and then play with my loot.

Good loot to you all!

Two Good Things

Eggplant Dengaku style! I made it for dinner last night. It's flanked by four onigiri. I'm looking forward to having some of those on my drive back to Boston today.

And the coolest spiral notebook I've ever seen:


It's pretty, it's got a nifty zipper pocket in the back:


It's got five sections separated by paper pocket dividers and clear plastic pockets of various capacities: business card, postcard and full page sized.


There's lined paper, unlined paper and the piece de resistance - graph paper:


Will I use it all? Probably not but it's so pretty. I got it at Borders but I can't tell what company made it. Sorry about the cruddy photos.